Upcoming ‘Bachelor’ Weddings: Chris & Peyton, Holly & Blake and…Penny Farthing!

Yes, we know everyone is excited to see photos from Bachelor faves Chris Lambton and Peyton Wright’s upcoming wedding on Saturday, May 5. And we know everyone is excited to see if Bachelor Pad 2 lovers Holly Durst and Blake Julian actually make it to the alter at their June 2 wedding — without Holly changing her mind and deciding she’d like to start dating one of the wedding caterers instead (Ouch! Diss! Burn!).

But, we also know that the wedding you’re MOST EXCITED about this upcoming wedding season is the wedding of Ok! Here is the Situation’s very own PENNY FARTHING (yep, that’s me!). Unfortunately, Chris Harrison won’t be presiding over my upcoming nuptials, but my fiance will be asking me if I’d like to accept his final rose…and it’s all happening THIS FRIDAY, April 27 at precisely 3:30pm PT.

And the most amazing thing about my upcoming wedding? Well, there are two things. One, it starts promptly at 3:30pm… and will be over by 3:40pm. And two, it’s going to cost us a grand total of $158 ($168 if we opt for the $10 commemorative photo). One thing I find particularly strange about the whole thing is that even though we’re getting married at City Hall, there’s still an exchange of LEGAL vows required. I mean, we’re not getting married in a church.

And we’re not allowed to write our own vows (I think they might be afraid someone could opt for a 20-minute-long poetry slam if they allowed the vows section to be a bit more free form, and, you know, they really need to keep the line moving. Haha.).

So – who decided we are legally required to “repeat after me” and say a bunch of specific things in order to legally be married in the United States? I find the whole thing to be rather odd. But, nevertheless, the fiance and I are VERY excited about the whole thing.

And because we here at Ok! Here is the Situation are like the fat kid running behind his friends shouting “wait for me! what about me!” in the world of Bachelor Nation (i.e. we like to think we’re an important thread in the fabric that is Bachelor Nation, but we’re pretty sure it’s sadly a one-way street), well….I had to share my wedding news before the likes of Peyton and Holly and Courtney trying on wedding dresses try to steal my 10 minute spotlight (Friday, April 27 from 3:30pm to 3:40pm)!

Also, you’d think that because my wedding is so low-key there’d be no room for any Bridezilla-style shenanigans, but, somehow, no matter the size or seriousness of the wedding, Bridal Meltdowns just seem to happen! Case in point, I, for the first time in my life, broke into tears on the phone with a customer service representative.

Yep. I was on the horn with someone from Free People because they somehow managed to send me a grand total of THREE blouses with colorful, embroidered swans on them (pictured, right) instead of the ivory-colored, crocheted dress (pictured, left) I was trying to purchase to wear to my 10-minute wedding.

And, while swan blouses one, two and three were being sent to me, somehow other shoppers — with apparently more online shopping ninja skills than me — were actually able to purchase the dress and receive the dress and thus, while I was on the phone with customer service, I was told that the dress was unfortunately SOLD OUT. (This was my first and LAST time shopping with Free People, by the way. Their clothes are kind of weirdly sized for prepubescent sticks anyway, so no one in my world will be grieving over the separation.)

Hearing that this dress was sold out and that my search for The Dress might need to continue was especially upsetting because, I don’t know if you know this, but finding a white dress that’s not made for a Disney princess and/or for someone from “middle management” is no easy feat.

Anyway….wish me/us luck this Friday! I finally got the pictured dress in a larger size and it’s being altered as I type (picking it up tomorrow!). So I’m hoping I’ll have something to wear. That fits.

We are very excited about BEING married, but neither of us has ever been very excited about the GETTING married part. So, this Friday we’ll knock the “getting married” part out super quickly…..and then there will be good food, good times with close family and then….a lifetime of happiness together! VIVA!

[P.S. It should go without saying that of course I had to make sure my wedding occurred between Bachelor seasons. Because come May 14, when Emily Maynard’s season of The Bachelorette premieres, I won’t even have 10 minutes to spare!]

Which upcoming Bachelor Nation wedding are you most excited for?

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Will Kiptyn propose to Tenley??

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Do you think Ashley and JP will make it?

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Do you think it's OK for U.S. Secret Service agents to solicit prostitutes in countries where it's legal?

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Do you think Blake and Holly will make it?

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2 Comments

  1. Isnt this absolutely hysterical Sa Ha!!!! I was dying reading it. And I have witnessed the serious situation w/ the Free People blouses BTW free People: 4 ALERT!!!! That is what happens when 4s run a business! they just need to make sure and hire some 6s to handle distribution and stock!!!!

  2. nah hun – i love this piece. i love you. and im so jealous i want be there for the most amazing 10 mins of your past. of course your future is what it’s all about and you bet i’ll be there for that. playa wedding pleeeease!!!?

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